Donna’s Daughter

August 27, 2007 

I have a 19 year old daughter, who at the age of 16 was diagnosis with bipolar. I got a second opinion and was told that she did not have bipolar. Well of course I liked the second opinion and went on with life. But now that I look back and have been doing some studying I believe she does have bipolar.

Now my problem, I do not know where to turn or what to do. One day she will say yes I do need help and then the next she is like Mom it is you that is crazy not me. I have never looked at her as crazy, these are her words.

I have taken her to counselors and she will make up some wild stories and the counselors look at me like I am the cause for all of her problems. So needless to say we don’t get any help.

She has done so many drugs that now she may have Crohn’s Disease. (We go this Thursday for a scope to verify what the doctor has said he is sure is Crohn’s.)

She has attempted suicide. She will never admit any wrong, it is always if this wouldn’t have happened or if he/she wouldn’t have done or said this or that. She has stolen off of us. When she talks I truly can not believe a word she says.

Then there are days she is so sweet and will help without expecting to get some kind of reward out of it.

I truly love her and just want to help her and do not know where to go. I have called mental health clinics and am told that in Illinois someone can sign themselves out no matter what their age is.

I have called the police and have even filed complaints against my daughter for the stealing, hoping to get her help and nothing.

Every where I turn is a brick wall and I am truly scared I won’t get her the help she so desperately needs before it is too late.

These are just very small examples of things we have been dealing with in the past 3 years.

We do have blue cross insurance. I do not know if since she just turned 19 if they will continue to cover her or not. But I truly do not care about the money. I only have one Jessica and can not or do not want to ever replace her or lose her.

She went to a mental hospital when she was 16 and that is where she was diagnosed. Franklin Williamson Human Services is who she was going thru for counseling then. She will not go to anyone affiliated with them now.

I have even thought about trying to get an attorney to get it where she can not have the choice of her medical/mental decision.

Does anyone know if this is possible. kind of like getting it to where she is mentally unfit to make decisions. Only until I can get her the treatment she needs so she can lead a normal life like so many others are doing now.

I have tried to choose my words carefully. I do not want to offend anyone. Please if I did accept my apology. I am only on here trying to find resources that I am evidently overlooking. I am a very worried mother that needs help.


  1. I am not an attorney, but we cover the topic of involuntary hospitalization in Bipolar Disorder For Dummies, on page 271. Having someone hospitalized against his or her wishes is tough to do, and that can be a good thing or a bad thing, depending on the situation. If you believe that your daughter poses a danger to herself or to someone else, you may be able to have her hospitalized even if she does not agree to it. The process varies by state and almost always requires one or more physicians to evaluate the person prior to admission into a hospital.

    Some states are developing so-called outpatient commitment procedures that involve closely monitoring a person who has a diagnosed mental illness (including the person’s medication compliance). If the person has a documented history of behavior that threatens his own safety or the safety of others, and if he requires medication to reduce the most severe symptoms and stops taking the medication, the law enables the state to move the person to a hospital against his will. These programs are designed for the most chronically ill patients with the highest risk of dangerous behaviors.

    Would your daughter agree to meeting with you and her family physician? That may be a good place to start, assuming your daughter would go along with it. I’ve found that some of the resistance to treatment comes from a person’s desire to have control over her life. What the person fails to realize, however, is that getting effective treatment gives you more control over your life.

  2. My daughter wont accept her bioplar illlness and wont talk about it and becomes very angry towards me when i try to talk to her i feel she blmes me has been in hospital twice there is nothing wrong with her her moods swings are terrible one day okay next day wont speak stares into space there asppears to be alot of behaviour straits she is not becommming angry with her dad now and looking for an argument we dont react but her behavior is unacceptable has a baby of 1 year old and trys to use him against us i have had a 3 month break with no contact as its has affected me and my husband with some of the nasty things she says and she has put on about 5 stone on in weight and is connfort eating any suggestions has a cpn but it s all confidential and i am not her next of kin her husband is and e is in denial too any tips

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