Posted October 8, 2011
“Bipolar Beat” makes me chuckle because it reminds me of Tiger Beat – the teen magazine I read when I was “normal.” Where do I start with my Story? Let’s begin with my Snarky Attitude – when you can laugh at your illness, then you have your Bi Polarism under control. I’ve been to “hell and back” so many times that I’m on first name basis with “the devil.”
My anxiety started when I was 23 years old. I developed this OCD about sleep. I had to have 8 hours of sleep so that I would be PERFECT at my job the next day. The more I thought about sleep, the more I became obsessed to the point at which I was sleeping 3 hours a night, working on my feet for 8 hours the next day, then driving to gym to do High Impact Aerobics so that I would remain thin, really almost an anorexic thinness. I lived this way for 5 years until I sought helped.
My mother was bipolar and was institutionalized her entire adult life. She had shock treatments in the early 70’s and really never recovered. I didn’t realize I was mentally ill also. Through therapy I realized I was a perfectionist, I was fatalistic, you know, thinking the worse possible outcome of any situation, and finally I was pessimistic on life. I’m now 48 years old. I’m married to a “Saint” really, and I have 4 daughters, 21, 19 ,17, 12.
I survived Thyroid Cancer the summer of 2005, in Louisiana, and during Hurricane Katrina. I thought Armageddon had come and I was living it! I am a SURVIVOR. You can follow me on Facebook… Desiree Cart Dugas and watch me blog my life away. If my words ain’t got a funny spin, then I ain’t gunna blog it. I have a blog somewhere in Computer Spaceland, but I really don’t know how where it’s at really. You can enjoy my silly videos on You Tube (desiree dugas) and say either, “she’s has good rhythm and can dance well,” or you can say, “SHE’S A TOTAL NUTCASE.” Either way, I’ll be totally flattered.
Sorry for any misspelled words, I don’t know how to use spell check or anything. I will be totally surprised if this blog even goes through Computer Spaceland.
Peace, Love, and Kumbaya!